Trial & Error

There are unspoken battles in raising a child with special needs. The more predictable notion of carting my children to a bajillion therapy appointments (and yes we have spent hours with F at therapy), and the quieter battle with self proclaimed supplements and diets.

F has a medication that helps him fairly well. That is, when everything is lining up for him to take that medication. Insurance has not been kind to us in this and we have had to tweak, wait, pray, and push through the trial and error.

The community surrounding autism has countless “cures”. They all believe that they know what causes autism and the overwhelm that comes from diving into this is very unique. Gluten and casein free, probiotics, inulin and fish oil, magnesium and b6, zinc, ashwaganda, it is absolutely insane the amount of advice that you can find on the internet to “cure” a neurological difference. Every webpage either raves about one of these remedies or seeks to disprove it. And we have tried so many of these things, not to “cure” our son, but simply to help him.

What causes autism?

I don’t know.

We don’t know.

We may never know.

But here is what we do know.

Autism is possibly rooted in genetics. Possibly not. Either way, it’s not anyones fault.

Autism is not a result of poor parenting. And yes, many actually believe this.

There is a rise in autism cases. And in my opinion, this is not because of a rising epidemic. This is purely because we are better at understanding and diagnosing autism when we see it.

Correlation is not causation. Please please remember this as you filter through pages of reasons why you may have caused this.

Early intervention is essential to helping children with autism to learn communication and self regulation skills.

Something that I have learned in these silent battles is to NEVER let these struggles steal your joy.

There will be successes as you tweak through remedies, therapies, or medications. There will be times when you want to rip your hair out because nothing is working at the moment. But mama, that is your child and they are only human.

If you are in these trenches of trial and error, first and foremost, connect with your child. Love them. Try a few things, love them some more. Fight for them. Try a few more things. And find a way to overcome YOUR burnout.

You and your child, you’ve got this.

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